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Thanksgiving ‘12
Happy Thanksgiving! Thankfully (and I do mean thankfully, ‘cause it’s Thanksgiving), I am not the proud owner of this positive pregnancy test surrounded by seasonal gourds. But, oh, what a table setting it is! Imagine walking into your relative’s home, smelling the turkey roasting in the oven and the cranberry sauce warming on the stove, and then drifting into the dining room to bear witness to the best darn use of a pee stick I think I ever did see. Amidst the gravy boats, metallic napkin rings, and festive linens sits a gift to the family with just a touch of urine (cap on, let’s hope) glistening under the light of the chandelier. It doesn’t get more familial than that, folks. Pee stick table settings are THE go-to holiday decoration. Especially if there’s no Autumnal Placenta to eat. Heck, by the time Alisa has her baby, she’ll be roasting that placenta on a spit at a summer barbecue! Yum.
But seriously guys, every year I take a moment on Thanksgiving to give thanks to you readers, and that’s a tradition I take to heart. As ridiculous as this blog is, and as absurd as the book will be, my favorite thing about writing this site is engaging with the people who read and contribute to it. You guys brighten my days just as much as I hope to brighten yours with pictures of explosivediarrhea and walrussnot. Thanks to everyone who takes the time to read, comment, submit, and email, and I hope that everyone is having a wonderful holiday and/or workday and/or birthday (shout out to my brother Michael, whose birthday it is today!). Also, you know how I mentioned cranberry sauce in the paragraph above? Well, come on by the blog for another interpretation of that later. After you eat.
Yay, Thanksgiving!
(submitted by Anonymous)